Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Something to think about...

Hello all! My name is Kristin Overman and the wonderful ladies here at G.U.M. have given me the privilege to take over their blog for a day! I have had many topics swirling around to write about and the one that keeps coming to the forefront of my mind is teenage pregnancy (gasp!). Shocking, right? At least that is how we are all trained to react.

Let me just start off by saying that I, in NO WAY, am promoting teenage sex (and pregnancy). This issue has become such an epidemic in our culture today and I want to shed some light on this issue from the teenage mom point-of-view. I myself was a teenage mom (and married my baby-daddy, lol). Even so, I became a walking target by family members, church family, and close friends. You walk around with this scarlet letter stapled to your chest, and have to pretend not to see the glares and whispers all around you. When you walk into the juniors department at 7 months pregnant, you can literally FEEL every eye on you. Judging you. Tearing you down. It doesn't matter to people that you are married (or in a serious relationship), hard-working, and self sufficiant. All they see is "IRRISPONSIBLE". And yes, teenage pregnancy IS irrisponsible, but it IS NOT the end of the world.

Bristol Palin (whom I am not the biggest fan of) has been under a TON of scrutany in the media lately for marrying the father of her baby. Since when does being in love and trying to get your life together such an unheard of thing? This is what I have a difficult time understanding. Our culture today looks at being a teen mom as "unthinkable" and "unforgivable"... but then when us teen moms have the courage to try and get our lives on track (be it married, going to school, or working full-time), there is hardly ANY support from anyone. In fact, it is the opposite. We are torn down, told we can't do it, and that we are being even MORE irrisponsible! It's like we can't win! I know many girls who have had babies around the same time I did (18,19,20), and I see their lives today. Most are married, hard-working, and happy. In fact, not one of them has pawned their child off to their parents to take care of, or live so irrisponsably that their kid isn't taken care of. All of their children are well-educated, fed, bathed, clothed, and loved. And at the end of the day, any mom would consider that a success.

When I became pregnant with my son at 18, my husband and I decided to go ahead and get married before he was born. Not because we felt an obligation to eachother, but because we wanted to experience the birth of our son as hudband and wife. I can tell people all day until I am blue in the face that we didn't get married because it was "the right thing to do"... but no one will every FULLY believe me :) Which is just fine, because I take a look at my life and my marriage, and know that we in fact DID get married for the right reasons. And I think 4 years of marriage and 3 kids later, we have proven ourselves enough that our hearts were in the right place.

So all I really ask is that when you see a teenage mom, give her a damn break! Her life is not ruined, in fact, it's enriched. I hope everyone will realize that there are far more terrible things in this world than bringing a beautiful life in to it.

I know this is a controversial topic and I could talk about it for days. This is just a short blurb of my frustrations. Most importantly, I want to stress the fact that we are successful in life. We may have taken a different path than "normal" to get here... but we're here, and we have worked twice as hard to be here. So the next time you see a teen mom (pregnant or with baby), uplift her, encourage her, strengthen her, give her the chance she deserves.

I appriciate you ladies having me!
Kristin Overman


  1. I totally agree with you. I was in the same situation. I have been with my babies dad for 5 years. I got pregnant when I was 17 with my son Aidan (after being with Adam for a year) and had him when I was 18. Then got pregnant with Adisyn when I was 18 and had her when I was 19. My life has so much more meaning and motivation in it now. I get the looks and all that because I am so young (21) and have 2 kids, but I say to hell with them. I am a great mom. I don't pawn my kids off, I stay here with them everyday. I take care of them, and they are well loved and if someone just wants to look down on me because I am young, then they are the irresponsible ones for judging a book by it's cover. I'm not going to say I'm perfect, but I try my hardest and that's all should matter. but thanks for posting this. young moms do get alot of scrutiny and dirty looks and we do need people to bless us.
    ♥ Jess

    Love your blog
    hope you can stop by sometime

  2. I love this post and am a teen mom too and i love my babies ... i am a great mom and love when people say you look to young to be a mom of 2 ... i say thank you!!

    Have a wonderful day ladies and thank you so much Kristin for the amazing post!