I am subscriber to Parent Magazine... I love it.. i find awesome easy recipes, great craft ideas, awesome organization tips... etc. Although upon reading my April Parent Magazine issue i was in shock at one article. It may be just because i find it hard to stomach whether it be true or not but I'm going to share a little about the article and see if other mothers have the same response...
The article name is called Feeling Groovy... it is an article about 3-4 yr olds discovering their body and .... well... masturbating. Now this word in the same sentance as 3-4 yr old... just gives me the shivers(call me old fashion). The article talks about a young girl who tends to rub herself against her seat belt buckle, the parent said she asked her pediatrician and he informed her she was masturbating... and to well... leave her alone and just do not acknowledge the behavior, do not imply its wrong, and do not bring any attention to what she is doing. The article then goes on to explain that at this age it is not about sex however it does in fact feel good and is an unconscious activity... like scratching an itch. SO as interesting or (at a loss of a word to fit here) but shocking as this may be it says this is what u can do if you notice your child has an overwhelming urge to "scratch that itch" 1. Leave them alone .. as long as they are doing it in private ... 2. Redirect their behavior... if they are doing this in public ... distract him. It also urges parents to not yell at them or punish them for this activity... so you don't give the child the idea that this is well... wrong. (and this is the one that shocks me the most) 3. Have a talk with them. Explain to the child that "you know it feels good, but that part of your body is private and rubbing or touching it should also be private... in your bedroom or bathroom."
Now i know this may be a natural instinct but to imagine my 5 yr old touching himself because it feels good just freaks me out to put it lightly. I was not sure i appreciated the article and wish this sort or discussion could have been left between the mother and her pediatrician. It seems that we are allowing our children to become aware of "pleasure" a little too early... i am not sure i agree with encouraging or even ignoring the behavior. I know kids at a young age are well ... Weird (ha ha to again putting things lightly) and that they are developing their personalities... but i am not sure i agree with this part or this type of "exploring". Maybe im wrong... i would love other mother input and opinions. Am i being to close minded? or does this in fact freak others out as well?
I think at a time where very young kids are sexualized at younger and younger ages, it's totally normal to be heebed out by an article like that. Who wants to be thinking about such things when they are at a single digit age? You're a mom and your instinct is naturally to protect them from such things...but the truth is whether we like it or not, that is just something that kids will do. While TOTALLY an uncomfortable subject, it sounds to me (I didn't actually read the article myself) like they handled it in a delicate manner. I think the best thing to take away from it is that you should treat it like it's not a big deal and redirect the behavior. I don't know that I agree on telling the child "I know it feels good"...you know, making that association for them, but just asking politely that they not do it and get them to do something else, I think I'd leave it at that.
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